‘My Life is My Message’

‘My Life is My Message’

Gandhi spoke this of himself, and ever since I read it, it has always been something which struck me as being exceptionally wise. So I just wanted to share a few thoughts I’ve had about this idea.

Recently, Madonna was quoted in an article where she said that she wanted to be like Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr (but not be murdered). She went further to say that we should all be like Jesus in our time.

I know that Madonna has become very religious of late, and I agree with her that we should all be like Jesus in our time, but the problem is that to be like Jesus isn’t just about words, it’s about how we live, in the real world. And for me, just like for Madonna – the biggest question is: What's my life's message?

For a long time now, these people have been heroes to me, who changed their societies with their voices and with their lives. But again – I have always hesitated to apply Gandhi’s statement to myself, that ‘My life is my message’ because I was afraid of what that would tell people. But here is something I realized recently: Whether I like it or not, my life really is my message. It’s true for everyone.

This is a hard truth to accept, if I believe that selfishness is not a good thing but makes the world a worse place; if I accept that to live like Jesus (the way that Mother Teresa, Gandhi, and Martin Luther King Jr. all tried to) makes a person truly great; if I accept that lives like that which have shown love, truth and justice at great personal expense, have made the world a much better place; if I believe all this, and then I turn around and take a good look at my life, I realize that:

“I don’t believe very many noble things. My Life testifies that the first thing I believe is that I am the most important person in the world. My life testifies to this because I care more about my food and shelter and happiness than about anybody else.” (Donald Miller – Blue Like Jazz)

Of course I’m guilty of this. And normally, I don’t think anything of it. There is a disconnection between what I say (and even think) I believe and what I actually believe.

When self-centredness rules, the world becomes a lonely place. Cut away from true friendship and the beauty of a selfless love. This is the stuff of broken relationships for the sake of material possession, or the self-gratification of a secret affair and the pain which it causes when the former beloved finds that they were no more than a tool for pleasure. We are all like this in one way or another. This is the stuff which Allan Bloom spoke of when he said:

“The most visible sign of our increasing separateness and in its turn, the cause of ever greater separateness is divorce… There is a quest, but ever more hopeless, for arrangements and ways of putting the broken pieces back together. The task is equivalent to squaring the circle, because everyone loves himself most but wants others to love him more than they love themselves.” (The Closing of the American Mind)

But this isn’t the last word on things. Yes, the problem is that we all love ourselves more than anyone else. But there is true love too.

There is the love between really great friends, between a husband and wife who really love each other more than they love themselves. We all recognize the nobility of a friend, a husband, a father or mother, who sacrifice themselves to save their friend, their wife, or their son or daughter. This is the kind of love we all want and need.

I think we can't really even imagine how good the world would be if it was only filled with such people who love purely and truly. But we can get at least a glimpse of heaven in the love of a good father, a friendship which crosses all barriers and is true, the love of newlyweds, or in a mother for her new-born baby. We can get a glimpse of heaven, if only in part.

As Donald Miller wrote

“I am learning to believe better things. I am learning to believe that other people exist, that fashion is not truth... I am learning not to be passionate about empty things, but to cultivate passion for justice, grace, truth, and communicate the idea that Jesus likes people and even loves them.”

I’m also learning that I can change – but this has only come when I’ve realized that what I believe in my head and what say I believe - that other people matter - isn’t enough. I have to live it. It’s come when I begin to realize how self-centred I really am. As Gandhi said, “It is our actions which count”. The struggle is to figure out in each new situation how I will respond and how I will change to become a better person.

How will I react to the realities of suffering and injustice around me? How will I respond to beggars, to street kids, to the person who stole my new shoes, or the person who offends me? How will I act when there is a choice between acting for my own comfort or going out of my way to help someone else. That’s the question.

What will our lives say about us? What message are we sending?

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”
Leo Tolstoy

“I am the problem”
-An idea that Donald Miller talks about in his excellent book ‘Blue Like Jazz’

“Fathers and teachers, what is Hell? I think it is the suffering of one who can no longer love.”
-from ‘The Brothers Karamazov’ by Dostoevsky